California Desert Road

15 Rules to Become a True Californian

If you want to become a true Californian, you need to follow some basic rules:

  1. Buy a car. A big one. Replace the regular wheels with truck wheels. If you don’t have a car yet, you must buy one immediately, because… if you don’t have a car, how THE HELL do you get around?
  2. You should master the art of making BBQs. If you want to socialize, you’d better learn how to turn on the grill.

    California BBQ Barbeque

    BBQ Boy (via

  3. When driving, follow your own rules. Traffic code?  Rules of the road? What is that?
  4. You must have a Mac, iPhone, iPad or any other Apple product. They pair well with to-go coffee cups.
  5. You should drink anything out of these jars:California Mason Jar
  6. Join some kind of trendy diet plan and remember to always eat organic.  Otherwise…
  7. Do not freak out if you see someone grocery shopping in their pajamas. Remember:  do not judge people by the way they dress.
  8. Try all kinds of exotic food and then write reviews about your “dining experience”. The weirdest, the better.
  9. Get a job. Are you working? So, what do you do for a living?
  10. Buy a pair of yoga pants and start exercising. Run, run as far as you can because you want to be healthy.California Fitness
  11. Buy a huge flat TV screen. Hang it on a wall. Yeeeah.
  12. Do not ever admit your weaknesses. Brand yourself.
  13. Pretend you are an “artist”. If you don’t fit into this category, you must be a project manager… or a data scientist.
  14. Use an app to book a spot at the best local restaurant. Use an app to pay for the meal. Use an app to find where you parked your car. Use an app to find your way home. Everything is better if there’s an APP for that.
  15. Invest in stocks. At least, discuss about it. How are the Tesla guys doing?
  16. Don’t take this list too seriously. You’d better go and have a talk with some neighbor. That will be more fair.

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